I sat down at breakfast with our son, and I asked some questions, and he politely answered. He wondered what my questions were in reference to ...but, the 'splainin' would come later. This is the discourse:
Q: "What are you free to do?"
A: "Lots of things."
Q: "What are you not free to do?"
A: "We are not free to disobey you."
Q: "Have you ever been tempted to say, 'Well, you do that, Dad!' when asked not to do something?"
A: "Probably ...I can't remember, doing it. But, maybe I thought it a couple times."
Q: "You said you can't remember doing it. Why wouldn't you do it?"
A: "Because it isn't right."
Q: "What do you think would happen if you did do it?"
A: "I'd probably get in trouble."
Q: "Do you know anyone who tells their parents what to do?"
A: "No."
Q: "Could you imagine the parent getting in trouble if they didn't do what the child wants?"
A: "No."
Statement of 'splainin': I imagine they emotionally separate themselves from their parents, and don't honor anything dad or mom stands for. And what were the beginnings like? Did they initially obey their parents only out of fear, acknowledging that they have more power? Is this what most parents do? I don't think so! And if this does exist in some circumstances, it would not be a surprise to find the now grown-up child repeating the rebellion.
Our kids are watching some old Star Trek episodes, and we have discussions afterwards. There was one episode entitled, "Squire of Gothos" ...where the starship crew could not figure out what to do. The person they were up against seemed unstoppable. But, just when their seemed no hope, a powerful voice penetrated the atmosphere ...it was his parents. His parents told him he was not to toy with Captain Kirk and his crew ...and they told him he wasn't being nice.
We all realize that kids are just that ...and they will act according to parental expectations much of the time.
But there are times when parents are not that involved in their children's upbringing. Hillary Clinton wrote a book entitled, "It Takes a Village" ...and I'm quite certain that when she was describing what it takes to raise a child, that she was not referring to gangs. But, in the parent's absence, gangs often do take the role ...developing admiration, a sick combination of security and paralyzing fear.
A California ex-cop goes on a killing spree ...and like a rolling snowball, some flaky supporters get caught up in it.
The Boston Marathon bombers ...now centered upon the one live brother, has shockingly brought much sympathy. It is good to be a sympathetic people ...but, not pathetically so. I understand how we are always searching for the reasons why ...and further are driven to know who or what would lead someone to do something so evil. I don't know why the photos released were significantly younger than the present age of 19, yet 19 is very young. Yet, we must realize that is no longer a child ...but, an adult.
We often say that some people are treated like dogs. I know that if a vicious dog was tearing a child apart ...life and limb, that the only effective course of action may be to severely wound the dog. In that event, if someone came upon the scene just after the ambulance sped away with the child ...seeing the dog in immense pain, they may feel anger towards whoever had injured the dog. That may be a natural and compassionate reaction. Yet, if we knew the whole story ...we may be able to better direct our anger.
For someone to place a bomb at the feet of other human beings, as this 19 year old did, is undisputed evil. And, yes, I know, as I said before, we often want to know why ...and what would possess someone to do something so evil? We may wonder who taught that young kid to be so far removed from conscience. Or we may be so angry, that we can only breathe revenge.
Whichever direction our emotions carry us, we wonder what impact or influence the parent had on the child. We tend to want to hold the parents responsible to some degree ...after all, it is the job of the parents. Parents are the first standards for their children ...as they set up rules and guidelines.
There are a few situations where the parent is not carrying the torch of wisdom. Short of confessing that fact, the parent nonetheless has to lead. I may be a sorry household where that fact is not understood. Yet, a parent can lead humbly without relinquishing that role.
I admit that our children know more than me in select areas ...such as this computer. I'm thinking that Al Gore would be happy to hear me admit that my children know some things that I don't know. But, what he doesn't know ...is the kind of relationship I have with my children, that cannot be fragmented by some politicized ploy. And that is much because of another relationship ...with our Heavenly Father. There is nothing that I know that He doesn't know.
We watched yet another Star Trek episode with our children ...library access to the first season. They visited a planet that they felt was like the Garden of Eden. They made mention that mankind had then twice experienced paradise, the first time being kicked out, but on this occasion they walked out on their own.
The way I view it, it was a real experiential glimpse of paradise for Adam & Eve, living it for a short time ...but good and evil was desired, as in the knowledge of it. But, paradise will be offered again ...not as in a Star Trek episode, or some religious fantasy of our version of the after-life. The after-life does exist, but not as we imagine it ...it exists as it is.
Let's back up a bit. My dad and mom experienced how their parents struggled to provide for them. Within those struggles, a little knowledge of good & evil was also mixed in. They went to school to learn good, but there were also bullies ...and the fights would not be considered good for everyone. Yet, they survived and for the most part became better people as a result of their experiences. My dad left home during the prime of his life, to serve our country in World War II. One of his sailor hats had a bullet hole in the brim. Some of the the brave soldiers survived, yet many did not. I look at all of our soldiers as good. They did not want to fight, yet they wanted to stop the evil intentions of others.
My dad's dad did not pretend to always know what was best, nor did he intervene in any of the ideological arguments about the course of something that was out of his control ...he continued to be the loving dad that he was. Life unfolded with its twists and turns. I heard no one tell stories of questioning where their parents were and what they were doing about it. Nor did I hear stories of how unloving their parents were during those difficult times.
We say it is different with God, our Heavenly Father ...and it is. God is all-powerful, and can do more ...but don't ignore the fact that He is wise beyond our comprehension. And He doesn't just deal with one group of children ...He loves us all. Yet, their are times we know no good can be discerned about something ...and we struggle with why God permits it. But, we must never forget that God desires for us to be with Him ...and we may imagine little purpose for sending His own Son to die, if not for our salvation. We may not see the purpose of so many others who seem to die for no reason ...but let us reason not to forget our eternal destination.
Where then do we stumble with our thinking? It must not be the same struggle for all of us, yet there are some struggles that are the main culprits of wayward thinking. It seems one of the biggest struggles is in understanding God's righteousness.
Why is it difficult to understand God's righteousness? Partly because we are selfish. It has to do with our focus. We are a very compassionate people also, but often more so after our own needs are met. Admit it ...there are Mother Teresa types in the world, but most of us focus on what is around us & we don't necessarily live within the throngs of poverty, and if we do, what is our focus. It seems logical to focus on that around us, and to what things that others have ...but how do we deal with that relationship-wise? We often question why things have happened to us, than to ask why things happen to others.
We may ask why anything has to happen to anyone. This also has to do with God's righteousness ...and it ties directly to our freedom of choice. Without choices, we are not free-thinkers. Without being free-thinkers, we cannot claim to have any feelings of our own. Without having any feelings of our own, we cannot love.
I can feel gratefulness ...to my parents for loving me. I can chose to love another, my best friend ...my wife. But, my wife and I desired to expand that love ...as we wanted to love children. We made that decision.
There was a choice made to expand love beyond the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. God decided to expand love, with creating other Beings ...and He decided to allow them to love too, by choosing.
Everyone knows that love is a risk, but well worth it. But it's not supposed to be a careless risk. We should approach it with wisdom. We should make wise investments, and we should not attempt to have ulterior motives ...as Lucifer did.
The problem with risking love, is in the lack of it, the diminishing of it, or the tiring of it. But, these do not really define love. True love should never be considered a risk. If it ever lacks, it seeks to be filled. If it is diminishing, it builds up. If it is tired, it receives encouragement and rest.
That's why a selfish love doesn't work ...because it is primarily focused on one. If it is lacking, it complains. If it diminishes, it wants to quit. If it's tired, it gets angry.
When love involves another, each seeks to fill the lacking of the other ...often accepting less, so the other can have more.
Jesus had everything, but gave it up ...to come down to earth. It would be beneficial if we would all come down to earth to realize this truth ...that He died on the cruel cross, so we could have more. But, we must also understand that the 'more' is presently what more we can give from our heart ...and the 'more' we primarily receive will be in eternity, our paradise with Him.
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